No. 309 Do you ever feel like you don't belong-because that's me-all the time, except at home...

Ugh-

It's really weird, but ever since leaving a small ass town, I feel like I never belong. Like i'm caught in between two worlds. You would think it would be the exact opposite, where I would feel that I never belonged in a small town etc. But no, instead, I find myself uber paranoid in this city I feel like. I always feel like I don't belong and it kind of freaks me out, and I always feel like i'm going to be singled out. I am in constant fear of not seeing other people like me etc...before I wasn't like this at all. I also realize this pass weekend that in reality, I don't belong and lots of people know I don't either. It's like why do I put myself in those situations when I know it's not me, I want to be like that, but if people can't accept or welcome me, then why bother...it's kind of devastating when you think about it, but what can you do? I looked around and everyone had someone, I don't have anyone, it's one of those freak moments of nature where you feel like you will never have what other people have dispite all the wealth and faith in the world...it kind of freaks me out, when I mean kind of, it really means A LOT...but what can you do right, nothing, you are periless and riding on fate's tail-though fate has been less then nice to you as always...