No. 242

Ok, so last year was extremely strenous, majorly, like my grades had suffered as well. It really sucked bad, I mean, I think in the whole year, 9 people and 4 animals close to me had died. It was not a happy time for me. So I went to San Francisco and it was complete hell. Never again, it's like, after xmas sale there sucked ass. Union Square was crap. Neimans and Saks had sales, but it was like reject stuff. Seriously, god it sucked ass and everything had been picked over. There were tons of sales people, but they didn't bother to put the things back together so it was a pig sty. Ok, so as we're parking car to go shop again, we get rammed by some old wasp man who says we're blocking his way and he needs to get by, whatever happen to common courtesy and class? Then a boy in von dutch and camo comes shoving out of the elevator when clearly it was my family and ours right of way. Whatever happen to shopping, it seems as if Union Square is just full of window shoppers who think they're a the shit-give me a break, whatever. When did the Nordies mall downtown have a cart that sells faux Louis, give me a break. Everything was shit and I didn't manage to buy jack crap. I went to Caramel and got loads as well as going to another mall. It's pathetic, people who think they are the shit and then what the fuck, it just pisses me off, it's like people now a days have no class or courtesy, but feel they are intitled to the best even though they only look and don't buy. ANNOYING and it just made me want to go home and just whenever I see anything that I ever want designer, I feel the need to just have Nordies order it for me, screw going to random places. Seriously, whatever happened to being nice, just buying shit and moving on. Seriously, it's like everyone has this bad chi about them, and hello, what happened to giant Sephora and North Face, they're gone, it's like all the stores are gone including FAO, what the hell? Yea, so in my heated trying to find all the shit, I couldn't find a thing, so yea, i'm sadden, but I walked about with 4 handbags. Some much for accessorizing.

I feel invigorated sort of for the new year yet with a fear that people are going to die. People do die slowly, but I don't need any deaths now, no drama, just life.

OMG, relevation in SF.

Realized that i've been played by life. I can't cheat life or try to trick it like all these recent years that i've tried to. I realized that you have to make the time you have here yours and it really doesn't matter what the fuck you do as long as you're happy. Seriously, because you can't cheat life or trick life or try to make loads of money or find a guy, you just need to be happy in the moment. That's all that matters, so why do we chase these endless goals when in reality, if you're happy in the moment-you've won, you've won the game of life.