No. 11

Ok, I just can't help it. I normally try to limit my entries to one a day, but screw it! The reason being is I've come across this revelation. The epiphany of my thoughts has been, "why do I say things I don't mean?" Yea, so this girl named Alison has another friend named Allysen, well Alison put in the same senior quote to the yearbook as Allysen. I'm on yearbook and knew about this. I told Liz, therefore then Liz told Allysen. Allysen is totally pissed and Alison calls me to see if she can retract it and put in a new one. This coming from a girl that says things and does things just because everyone else does. She's totally brained washed by society and I don't feel sorry for her because she lets it happen. I've seen this at least for three years now and I have no pity for her. She also thinks I'm shit and regards me as the Asian chick on Daria. I won't let her change that quite, yes I'm toying with fate, because she needs to think on her own. People don't tell her how horrible she is, even though everyone hates her! I don't get people some times, if it were me, I wouldn't want to know either, but hey you know? So, she says she wants to retract it because Allysen has "some problems, or rough times." I didn't say this, but I thought, "Alison, the only problem she has is you stealing her quote, which oh so means so dear to her!" I told her no, then she hung up. She's not very social and nevertheless, she doesn't really talk to me unless she wants something. Why is that, people don't talk to each other unless they want something?

I was reading someone else's blog whom I know, but I will not name the blogger. This girl is perfect in the eyes of society, yet she has been shamed by what we deem has poisons. She tells everyone and possibly can get her ass kicked for it my all different kinds of adminstration. She says she feels free due to the poisons in her body. For the lack of a better word, I will use the words poisons, but others may say they're just simply stimulates. I remain an utter virgin too all except wine. Yes, I sip a few during dinner and oh yea champagne mixed with fruit juice at weddings twice. That's it, I'd try to go smoke cigarettes and cigars, nothing more, but that would be it. I don't think of myself as a bad person, even though society would say I am. I know I'm killing my body, but they always say that you only live once. I don't understand why people need to have foreign objects in their body to make them feel different. What's the deal, you fall back on to life again sooner or later? It doesn't make you a better or worser person, it may boost or lower your ego, but can someone truly find other things that society deems right as a better way too feel more free?

Goddess_333